Desired gifts from Santa Claus

Dear Santa Claus, I've wanted a fire truck for three years now. please bring me a fire truck this year. dear child Your persistence irritates me, this new year while you sleep, you will set the house on fire so you will get not one but all the fire trucks from yours and nearby cities. *** Dear Santa Claus, this year I was very obedient ... the only thing I ask you for this year is peace in the whole world. dear child Your parents smoke marijuana, don't they? *** gnaw the naked child, I would like to have a TV game. why aunt zporet me etin bukafar will end on topra rapota. *** Dear Santa Claus, I would very much like you to make mom and dad come back together again this year ... I miss Dad very much. dear child What do you want from me, to ruin the relationship between your father and his secretary? *** Dear Santa Claus, I want a bike, a video game, a dog or a cat, a pony and a bass guitar! dear child how about a slap? *** Dear Santa Claus, I left you cookies and a glass of fresh milk under the Christmas tree ... and carrots for the deer ... with a lot of love ... dear child every year after I drink your milk I can't go out of the toilet for two hours, and your carrots make the deer fart in my face while they fly. If you're thinking of flattering me, leave a bottle of your grandfather's wine, a cigar, and get Mom to put on the panties her boss gave her last year.